Some people are born leaders, exuding natural confidence and demonstrating an innate ability to nurture those around them. Most leaders, however, learn by observing the examples set forth by others. I fall into the category of “learned leader.”
The charisma that often defines the natural leader has never come easily for me. Fortunately, I’ve had great mentors who have helped me grow, both personally and professionally. Of all the people who have provided strong examples of leadership, no one stands out more than my father.
One would be hard-pressed to find a better leader than my dad. With Father’s Day just around the corner, I thought the best tribute I could pay to the greatest leader I’ve ever known would be to share the three most important lessons he taught me.
Be Courageous
My father is a huge fan of Westerns, and one of his favorite John Wayne quotes is “Courage is being scared to death… and saddling up anyway.” To him, this isn’t a throwaway sentiment; it’s a way of life. My father taught me that there was a difference between courage and bravado. Courage isn’t a matter of being fearless; it’s a matter of being willing to accept the outcomes of your decisions, no matter what.
My dad started his company when he was 29 years old. He was working at an engineering firm when one of his clients, a little company called Coca-Cola, asked him to strike out on his own. They promised to come along with him if he left, but he had no formal guarantee. He had a young family at home that depended on him, but he was shrewd enough to recognize the incredible opportunity ahead of him. After weeks of agonizing and soul-searching, he made the decision to move forward on his own. He knew that there was risk involved, and he had the courage to move forward in spite of it.
I once asked him how he became comfortable with the situation. His answer was plainspoken and simple—whether the business succeeded or failed, he would do whatever it took to provide for his family. He was willing to accept the outcome of his decision, regardless of how hard he would have to work. The prospect of jumping into the unknown still scared him to death, but he had the confidence to saddle up anyway and take on the challenge.
Be Humble
Fortunately, his business grew quickly and became quite successful. Before he knew it, he was the head of a reasonably large company, signing large deals and influencing the industry. This type of success would swell most egos, but my father was unaffected. He remained the straightforward and uncomplicated man he had always been. Over the years, his humility and simple tastes became a trademark of sorts.
When I was in my early twenties, I had a fair bit of success in my career and was pretty proud of myself. My father took me aside and encouraged me to remain humble.
“Everybody falls down at some point,” he told me, “stay humble so that the people around you want to help you up, not knock you back down.” His words struck a chord with me, and suddenly his decisions to embrace simplicity made sense. His humility was genuine, and it encouraged those around him to demonstrate compassion and understanding when things got rough. In business, everyone is jockeying for position and prestige. My father taught me to take a different path. He taught through example that cultivating humility and focusing on others always pays off in the long run.
Be Generous
Perhaps the most important lesson he taught me was to be generous. While running his company, he learned that a young employee on his team had tragically lost their young child to a terminal illness. The employee held a junior role inside of the organization and didn’t have much money. Worse yet, he didn’t have sufficient insurance to cover the medical costs, let alone pay for a funeral for the child.
News of this tragedy reached my father, and he quietly and privately paid for the funeral costs out of his pocket. There was no need for a company fundraiser; to him, that was too opportunistic. This was not a PR stunt. A member of his team was in pain and needed help, and he responded personally. To this day, none of his colleagues know what he did. That act of generosity and compassion has remained with me over the years and served as the best example of what a leader should be.
Leadership is not about titles. It’s about bringing out the best in others and serving as an example for your team. That is often easier said than done. Fortunately for me, my father was always there to provide an example of what a leader should be: courageous, humble, and generous. I couldn’t ask for a better role model, both personally and professionally.