The Power of Letting Go
The Paradoxical Approach to Unlocking Solutions
Viktor Frankl, the renowned psychologist and Holocaust survivor, pioneered a method called "paradoxical intention" to help patients overcome phobias and neurotic habits. Instead of traditional techniques like relaxation for insomnia, Frankl encouraged patients to try not to fall asleep. This counterintuitive approach shifted the patient's obsessive focus on the problem, eventually allowing them to sleep normally. Frankl's technique is a testament to the power of changing perspectives when dealing with persistent issues.
Similarly, mathematician Dan Rockmore describes solving proofs as "chewing on a problem," akin to a dog gnawing a bone to reach the "marrow," or the heart of the problem. In an article for The New Yorker, Rockmore explains how breakthroughs often occur when not actively seeking solutions. He recounts his experience with wave equations, where no progress was made despite persistent efforts.
Frustrated, Rockmore went for a run, and as he crested a hill, the solution suddenly came to him. This underscores the importance of taking a break and allowing the mind to unconsciously process the problem. Rockmore’s story is not unique among scientists and creatives, who often find that their best ideas emerge when they least expect it—during a walk, a shower, or even while daydreaming.
When you're struggling to solve a problem and feel like you've exhausted all options, it's time to try something new. Epictetus advises "try the opposite," a strategy successful in various contexts. Seneca recounts how Augustus, the first Roman Emperor, faced a political rival. Despite the efforts of Augustus and his council, they couldn't find a solution. When Augustus's wife suggested a different approach, Augustus made amends with the conspirator, who then became his most loyal adherent. This story highlights the effectiveness of trying something different when feeling stuck. Taking breaks, focusing on other tasks, or getting out in nature can also spark new solutions.
Modern psychology supports this approach with the concept of "incubation," a period where stepping away from a problem allows the subconscious mind to work on it. Numerous studies show that after an incubation period, people often return to their problems with fresh insights and renewed creativity. This principle is widely applied in various fields, from business to the arts, where taking a step back can lead to breakthroughs that intense focus and effort failed to achieve.
Awa Kenzo, the renowned archery master, told his student Eugen Herrigel, "What stands in your way is that you have too much willful will." This paradox suggests that the harder we try to control outcomes, the less control we actually have. This is evident when an archer over-tries to hit a target and misses, or when a golfer tries too hard and sends the ball into the trees. Excessive desire and effort can hinder achievement. Kenzo’s teaching echoes a broader truth seen in many disciplines: the need to balance effort with relaxation. Overemphasis on control can lead to anxiety and reduced performance, while a more relaxed approach often yields better results.
To solve problems, hit bullseyes, or perfect a golf swing, we must be flexible and able to shift our focus away from the problem. As leaders, we need to loosen up and step away from issues to return with renewed focus. It's only by pushing our "willful will" aside and shifting our attention that we can solve our toughest problems. Paradoxically, by loosening our grip and not trying too hard, we enable success.
This approach also applies to leadership and management. Leaders often face complex challenges that require innovative solutions. However, constant pressure and intense focus can lead to burnout and a lack of creativity. Encouraging team members to take breaks, engage in different activities, and approach problems from new angles can foster a more productive and innovative work environment. It’s essential to create a culture where taking a step back is seen as a valuable part of the problem-solving process rather than a sign of weakness or failure.
Moreover, this principle extends to personal growth and development. Individuals striving for success in their careers or personal lives often fall into the trap of overexertion, believing that relentless effort is the key to achievement.
While dedication and hard work are crucial, so is the ability to let go and allow for natural progress. Practices such as mindfulness, meditation, and even hobbies unrelated to one's primary goals can provide the necessary mental space for growth and breakthroughs. By stepping away and engaging in activities that bring joy and relaxation, individuals can return to their goals with a clearer mind and a fresh perspective.
In summary, the paradox of letting go to achieve success is a powerful concept that transcends various fields and aspects of life. Whether through Frankl's paradoxical intention, Rockmore’s unconscious problem-solving, or Kenzo’s advice on willful will, the message is clear: sometimes, the best way to solve a problem is to stop fixating on it. By embracing flexibility, taking breaks, and trying new approaches, we open ourselves to creative solutions and greater achievements. As leaders, individuals, and problem-solvers, the key to unlocking our full potential often lies in the simple act of letting go.